<p>What I learned this weekend:</p><ul><li>Turkey can be chewed with your front teeth.</li><li>Steak cannot.</li><li>Drinking five Cosmos in quick succession after eating two small pieces of turkey (see above) and some smashed potatoes is not the smartest thing to do.</li><li>Having your boss get drunker than you at the Holiday Party is a good thing.</li><li>Because if that happens you can get some pretty good ammo for the following year ;o)</li><li>Having your <span title="Boyfriend" class="serendipity_glossaryMarkup">BF</span> get as drunk as your boss is a good thing (but only if the two of them are good friends to begin with).</li><li>Letting your BF give your boss a wooden snowman table decoration to ‘play with’ during this drunkfest probably isn’t the smartest thing. (don’t. ask.)</li><li>A high beer-to-man ratio (BTM Ratio) is good if you want to dance ;o)</li><li>Leaving your heated mattress pad and your electric blanket on while you are in a drunken stupor can lead to *ahem* bad things.</li><li>Mind over matter is real. If you lay in bed, grit your teeth, breathe through your nose slowly and think happy non-food related thoughts you can be brought back from the brink of pukage. My thought? &quot;I will NOT ruin Cosmos for myself by puking. Will. Not.&quot; (I haven’t been able to drink Corona since 1999)</li><li>Asking R for a Cosmo and to ‘supersize me’ the very next night at his office Holiday Party isn’t so very smart.</li><li>Beef Tenderloin CAN be chewed with your front teeth ;o)</li><li>Sunlight CAN harm you. Especially after five cosmos on an empty stomach, forgetting to take an advil before bed as well as forgetting to drink any water at all.</li><li>Roger is wonderful. He brought me the advil I forgot as well as two glasses of water before he left for work (yeah, he had to go to work after all the merry-making of the night before. He is He-Man).</li><li>I’m not as young as I used to be.</li></ul>
<p>Oh, and this:</p><p><br />
</p><div><br /><div align="center"><table width="300" height="120" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" border="0" bgcolor="#000000"><tbody><tr><td><table width="100%" height="100%" background="http://extimg.jokesunlimited.com/whitedot.gif"><tbody><tr><td colspan="3"><table><tbody><tr><td align="center" class="elfcontent"><img src="http://extimg.jokesunlimited.com/elfnames/smallelf.jpg" alt="" /></td><td valign="center" align="center" class="elfcontent"><b>Christmas Elf Name</b><br /><br />My Christmas Elf Name is</td><td align="center" class="elfcontent"><img src="http://extimg.jokesunlimited.com/elfnames/smallelf.jpg" alt="" /></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="center" colspan="3"><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top" align="right" class="elfcontent"><img src="http://extimg.jokesunlimited.com/elfnames/firstnames/16.jpg" alt="" /></td><td valign="top" align="left" class="elfcontent"><img src="http://extimg.jokesunlimited.com/elfnames/secondnames/4.jpg" alt="" /></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="center" class="elfcontent" colspan="3"><a href="http://jessaluknits.com/exit.php?url_id=291&amp;entry_id=78" title="http://www.jokesunlimited.com/christmas_elf_name.php" onmouseover="window.status=’http://www.jokesunlimited.com/christmas_elf_name.php’;return true;" onmouseout="window.status=”;return true;"><b>Get your Christmas Elf Name at JokesUnlimited.com</b></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></div></div>

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