Things to say to your Teen while knitting for the Olympics

As a public service, I thought I would share with all KO parents of teens the lines I have used to keep the child (aka Dobby) at bay while trying to
complete the project from hell my KO project in case you are having trouble coming up with snappy brush offs:

  • I’m not really here, you are imagining me.
  • helloooo figments of your imagination cannot actually speak so move on.
  • um ripping here! No I do not care that your friend’s eleventeen year old third cousin fourteen times removed is marrying a 65 year old millionaire who owns a…waitaminute he owns a sheep farm in upstate NY? Which friend, again?
  • Mommy can’t talk until Monday.
  • I said, don’t talk to me until Monday!
  • I’m sorry, do you think I joke when I say “don’t talk to me until MONDAY“?
  • There’s no talking in the Olympics!
  • What do I look like? Your caregiver? Go buy your own milk!
  • NO you cannot watch ‘Fresh Prince of Bel Air’ (ugh. gagme.) Mommy is watching Pride & Prejudice and Darcy is on camera right now so BACK. THE HELL. OFF.
  • Two words: Frozen. Pizza.
  • You want to sleep over at your friend Erin’s? SUUURE!!! (the problem now is…I’m not sure if she meant the boy Aaron or the girl Erin…oopsies) (KIDDING, PEOPLE! …mostly)

Thank you all for your words of encouragement – they are much appreciated! I’m sure you all can understand that I haven’t been answering you all individually because my hands are permanently attached to my Addi’s ;o)

The mistake, for those who couldn’t see it, was that I skipped an ENTIRE row of the chart so I had wonky diamonds. It shall all become clear when I post photos of the completed sweater…sometime next freaking month.

*We live in an old house and don’t have a door that will fit her room so she gets a curtain. We could probably get her a new door however, she’d freeze to death in the winter and it’s a lot more fun to say “Privacy is a privilege!” than to try to install a door ;o)